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OWNAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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This post is both one year old, and several days new. On August 19, 2006, I attended the wedding of Will Tsui and Vicki Hsu. Vicki and I (flanked by Wee-seing and Janice Ng), grew up together at the Cleveland Chinese Christian Church. Further, she, along with Janice and I, were the only ones who lived in the far east suburbs in Lake County.
The wedding was held in Chicago, IL. Fortunately, Chicago, IL, is also home to two of my favorite peeps, Judy Wang and Stefanie Yam. Judy is also an alumnus of The Greatest University on the Planet, whereas I met Stef way back in the day at the Midwest Chinese Church Association Summer Retreats. As fate would have it, they now work at Unilever in Chicago. Interestingly enough, they had never met until I individually told them to meet up with me while I was in town for the wedding, and then to coordinate with each other, so we could meet up at the same time. Such is Warren Den, bringing people together.
Not only did Judy attend the same undergraduate institution as I, but, she also lived in the same freshman dorm, Lincoln Tower.
Stef right now is probably very busy, as she will soon be married to Andy Wang. Here is their engagement photos, very well done!
Of course, no visit to Chicago would be complete without visiting Chicago's Chinatown. After eating at the obligatory Joy Yee's Noodle Shop, us Cleveland'ers decided to act all chinky and pose in this pagoda like structure.
So let us harken hither to the recent past. For their one year wedding anniversary, Will and Vicki chose no other spot than God's Paradise Here on Earth: San Diego, CA. Besides availing themselves to all that San Diego has to offer, I took them out to eat at the J6 Restaurant in the Gaslamp District of downtown San Diego. Now, considering myself to be their "host," I of course was NOT going to let them lay even one finger on the bill, especially considering it was their wedding anniversary.
J6 is also a hotel with a rooftop bar lounge. The restaurant does not have separate restrooms, rather, you simply use the ones in the lobby. Once we had finished eating, I excuse myself to "use the restroom," exiting the restaurant into the lobby, walked out of the lobby to OUTSIDE, circled around the corner, and back into the restaurant entrance. There, I told the hostess to give me the bill, IMMEDIATELY, as I would not tolerate my friends paying for dinner in my city, on their wedding anniversary. After picking up the tab, I then went back to our table, where we finished eating dessert, pictured above. On an "unrelated" note, I have not yet bought Will and Vicki a wedding gift ;) HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!!!! | | |
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This past weekend, I attended the wedding of Byron and Liza (pronounced like Liza Minelli) Hing. Back in the day, some of us would call him Bai Ren, meaning white man. At the time this seemed particularly apropos, since he was so tall and gangly. I am happy to report, that the years have done him well, and he has done away with his slouch, and proudly stands at 6'3", towering over my towering 5'4" frame (and Liza's). Pictured above is us three at the rehearsal dinner (I was honored by being asked to usher).
It's strange to consider that Byron is now a married man. A mere five years ago, I was at the wedding of his older sister Abby. Abby came with with her two sons in tow. I first met Byron at various family functions, functions through the Organization of Chinese Americans, and ultimately as a brother at the Cleveland Chinese Christian Church. One of my first memory of Byron and his family is playing ping pong in his basement, and slamming the ball with such force that my follow through resulted in my paddle slamming against a pole, and breaking. I also remember Colleen liked to bark AT her dog. One year, Byron was the starting center of an ill-fated church basketball team that played in the annual CCUC Basketball Tournament in Chicago. It may have been the worst collection of basketball talent ever assembled, with us going winless in the lowest division. Byron went through a stretch in his life where he dabbled in militant Republicanism. I am happy to report, that based upon information and belief, I feel that he has settled into a warmer, gentler, militant Republicanism. 
When I RSVP'd, I requested that I be seated at a table with 8 single women and one good wingman. Alas, my request was denied. Instead, I was put at the table with Clevelanders. In the top row from left to right, we have Colleen (diminutive twin sister of Byron), Liza, Byron, Amy Huang, and Benny Fong (VideoGameMaster) and yours truly. The second row consists of Alberta Lui, Howard Lee, Vickie Yeung (Vickie's dad, Reverend Yeung, blessed the banquet and per custom, began his prayer with "BOW YOUR HEAD".) and David Louie. It's tough getting your game on when all the bride's friends are from Harvard and the groom has no female friends. But hey, at least I got two free dinners, an open bar, and a free brunch. CONGRATULATIONS BRO!!!! | | |
| Aight peeps. I know that I have been totally AWOL from Xanga land recently. It has nearly been 3 months since I last posted, which is utterly unacceptable. I promise to be much more diligent from here on out, as I know that some of you are experiencing withdrawal symptoms from Words and Way of Warren deprivation. Hopefully, you will find these new entries ineffable yet noetic............
This entry is in some ways a companion entry to my post on March 6, 2006. I explored the phenomenon of same-race bias, and described how it manifested itself in my occupation. At the end of the incident, I concluded that white chicks all look the same.
Pictured below is obviously moi, to the left, and a former client of mine on the right, whom I shall call Mr. Dui. I took Mr. Dui's case totrial. What we are pictured wearing below, is very similar to the garb we wore during the trial.
In the beginning of a criminal trial, the prosecutors have to establish the identity of the accused. The prosecutor will call the arresting officer as the first witness, and then have him point out the defendant in court. The cop in this case was a young white dude, possibly fresh out of the academy.
Oppressor of the People: Officer Whitebread, do you remember arresting Mr. Dui on the night in question?
Officer Whitebread: Yes, I do.
Oppressor of the People: Is Mr. Dui in court today?
Officer Whitebread: Yes, he is.
Oppressor of the People: Can you point him out in court, and describe an article of clothing that he is wearing?
Officer Whitebread: Yes, I can.
Officer Whitebread points at ME.......
Officer Whitebread: The man I arrested is seated the at the defense table. He is wearing a black suit jacket, white shirt, and a black tie with gold pinstripes.
I glance over at the jury. Some of them have smirks and bemused expressions on their face...........
Oppressor of the People: (realizing his case is on the verge of collapsing before even getting underway). Uhhhmmm....are you sure?
Officer Whitebread looks at the prosecutor with a puzzled look..........
The prosecutor begins furiously pointing/nodding at me with his chin, spasmically twitching like a guy with Tourette's...........
Officer Whitebread continues to stare at the prosecutor uncomprehendingly.........
The prosecutor seems poised to mouth words like "THE OTHER GUY!!!" to the cop........
I prepare to lodge an objection for leading the witness.............
Right before I object the cop finally gets it...........
Officer Whitebread: Oh yes! I mean, I arrested the OTHER guy seated at the defense table. He is wearing a grey sweater with a black t-shirt.
After prosecutor finishes his direct examination, it is now my turn to begin my cross examination...........
ME: Officer Whitebread.....now....my memory seems to fail me....but..... what time did you arrest me?
THE JURY HOWLS WITH LAUGHTER!!!!
Unfortunately, I lost Mr. Dui's case. But, hey, at least I can share with you yet another sterling example of same-race bias 
On a more serious note, I hope this case highlights the dangers and very real possibilites of mistaken identity with regards to ethnic minorities and white cops. I was wearing a full suit and tie, whereas my client was dressed casually. It was plain as day to everyone in the courtroom, that I was the attorney, and the other Asian person was the defendant. Yet even with these visual clues, the officer's first guess and recollection, was that I was the person that he arrested that evening. To Officer Whitebread, all Asian men look the same.
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